Thursday 30 April 2009

Roses are Red

While the Princess and I were creating our 'Happy Diaries' I also covered this note book which I am using to write down my goals.

The background paper is scrapbook paper, the lady on the swing (I love swinging!) was cut out from a card, that is to remind me to reach for the stars and the "Roses are Red" was a song title I cut from sheet music and that is to remind me to take the time to "smell the roses" and also that my life will become rosy again!


I need to keep that in focus, this morning I woke up feeling very weepy, the intensity of my grief was quite overwhelming. Grief is such a physical pain as well as an emotional pain.

I pulled myself together and sent a long venting email to WINZ, our social welfare department, who I am now relying on for my income as Babes decision to follow "true love" has put both of us into a permanent dire financial situation.

There we are, I wasn't going to use my blog to vent but right now just need the outlet and all your support makes it so much better!

To keep that positive focus going after a rocky start to the day I wrote a list of 'to do's in my diary. All yukky things so as a consolation prize I took a little walk to the OP Shop(thrift shop) and that I will show you the results of tomorrow!

Oh and in my haste to get to the Op Shop I locked myself out of my house and had to borrow the ladder from a painter next door and climb to the second level of the house where fortunately I had a left a door open!

All in a mornings work!

Off now to wash vintage china and set up a photo shoot!

Have a good day!

Take Care
Rachaelxo

Wednesday 29 April 2009

Positively Pretty

I had such a good day yesterday, aired my dirty laundry to the world so to speak!!! It was something I needed to do as part of my grieving process/journey.

The beautiful comments left made me feel so good, the kindness and caring that flowed in from around the world gave me such comfort. Thank you!

I had real life visitors, lovely friends bearing gifts of bags of fruit, to keep my vitamins up and this gorgeous hot pink cyclamen.


I Skyped with my brother who lives in Australia and had a late night supportive phone call from my other brother who works in Australia but lives near by. Also a travel update from my Mum who is currently holidaying in . . . Armenia . . .

Backtracking a little bit to the weekend just gone . . . a good friend gave me a lovely idea for the Princess and I to do which is to keep a "Happy Diary" and each day journal something positive in it.

We 'made' our 'Happy Diaries" on Saturday, just hard covered notebooks we decorated (thanks Linda for the supplies!),

mine here, yes the couple was a deliberate choice, I am not going to give up on my love, hopes and dreams of having romance in my life!


and the Princess's, how cute is that!


On Sunday I felt really down and quite lethargic, it was an overcast and windy day, matched my mood really! anyway . . . quite spur of the moment, the Princess and I jumped in the car and drove to a nearby beach, she in her pink slippers, now ruined!. We walked and collected shells and Neptune's necklaces (seaweed) and blew the cobwebs away!


And do you know, it was so nice not to be thinking of having to get home to get a cooked meal on the table and all that sort of stuff!

Finding my positives where I can!

Off now, need to get some stuff put on Trade Me as my financial circumstances have changed dramatically, along with everything else!

My toes are still waiting as well, I am thinking Revlon Red, its sexy!

Have a good day

Take Care
Rachaelxo

Tuesday 28 April 2009

A broken heart


Just over a week ago my 12 year marriage to Babes ended shockingly and suddenly with the added complication of a third party presence.

Its very difficult to accept as I thought we had a relatively stable and harmonious relationship. We certainly provided the Princess with a happy home life.

The depth of my hurt and pain is unbelievable and at times feels unbearable.

In saying that I have dug very deep and pulled up an inner strength I didn't know I had to get the Princess and I through this in a way that will have the least long term damage, particularly on her.

I have been reading and writing, making tiny tentative plans that are helping to empower me to work towards the bright and sunny future the Princess and I have ahead of us.

We are so very lucky to be cushioned by the loving support of family and friends.

We are going to make it through this, with or without Babes, and be better for it.

I am going to try and blog everyday, keeping my future posts light and positive with lots of pretty things to show and tell!

I was going to clean my house today which is not so pretty but I think I will take a little 'me' time and paint my toes or something!

Take Care
Rachaelxo

Monday 20 April 2009

I need to take a blogging break

I have stuff going on at the moment, will be back just not sure when.

Take care
Rachaelxo